Google Search Term Awards

Well, it's that time of year again… time for The Digital Sanctuary's award winning search terms in all their glory.  As I've mentioned with previous awards, you know I would never alter or edit these profoundly revealing ACTUAL searches that come up in my sitemeter.  Furthermore, I wouldn't change them either.

• jack hayford have yourself a mary christmas

• ask marshill anyuthing (read slowly & carefully)
  

• digital media preaching macs

• rotating kawasaki Christians

• sudogwongangnambonbujang (I know, Charismatic)

• "Technology" AND "Christianity" AND "Online" AND "Podcast" AND "Advantages" ('90's web surfer)

• foursquare church pulpits

• apostolic facebook apps

• the evolution of traffic lights from 1920-2007   (?)

• Scott ragan chritianity (read slowly & carefully)

• هد أدناه الصورة بسياقها الطبيعي ضمن الصفحة  (if this is bad language, I'll retract)

• PakistanRawalpindi, Punjab (how you arrived here, I don't know)

• hd chruch projectors (fascinating)  
  

• iPhone deliverance (this must mean iPhone delivers)

• technological singularity strictly enforced

• Calvnism vs. armism (predestined for majorly bad spelling)

Who gets your search term award?

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In case you've feel you've landed at this site by accident, please know you are not alone.  It's quite possible your friends are here.  Because I present you with a monthly dose of Search Term Awards (yes, I know I missed a month), you should know, this is the company you keep:

 (Remember I never modify words, spellings or innuendo)

• loosing your spiritual gifts

• iPhone reception sucks

• "open source Christians"

• spiritual bad Américains

• InternetJesus

• "guy kawasaki" church 

• worship sfotware blogspot

• Gods of technology 

• emergent church beth moore! 

• Globalization depresses me

Yes, each one creates it's own separate chuckle.  From the Broward County Public Schools to Microsoft Corp, from AT&T WorldNet Services to Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center, from Niceville, Florida to Roachdale, Indiana  (see - how could I even make these up?).  From Berlin  to  Budapest, from Mumbai, India to Johannesburg, South Africa to Vanves, Ile-de-France everyone is interested in the Church and technology.

If the Vatican can issue 10 Commandments for drivers, I have no problem canonizing the Ten Commandments for Blogging Believers: 

(In NKJV, of course):

1. Thou shalt have no other blogging platform than WordPress (or in rare exceptions, Typepad, but that's where we draw the line).
2. Thou shalt not make for thyself an idol out of thy blog, thy blog's Technorati ranking, thy blog's Feedburner stats, thy blog's Analytics, Metrics, etc, etc.
3. Thou shalt not fail to map thy domain name from the beginning (and make it simple).
4. Remember to configure your blog to ping Google, Technorati, etc. or you must do it manually to keep it holy.
5. Honor thy aggregators, and the bloggers who began before you, last month.
6. Thou shalt not kill thy blog when disillusioned due to traffic drops or bounce rate stats, but let it live on through it's long tail.
7. Thou shalt not commit comment time elsewhere, when posting at home is what counts.
8. Thou shalt not steal without acknowledging the correct Creative Commons attribution (or at the very least a HT).
9. Thou shalt not bear false witness when joining all the Web 2.0 social networking sites. 
10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's themes, presentations, archives, subscribers' lists, etc.

Sometimes you've just got to take your blogging seriously.  But not today.

Disclaimer: This is a joke; filed under humor; not to be taken as gospel truth; does the image even remotely look like the real Ten Commandments?

There's a modest (no pun intended) controversy surrounding the Flamingo Road Church broadcasting situation.  Joshua Cody, along with many others, covered it recently at Church Marketing Sucks in My Naked Pastor.  

It seems Lead Pastor, Troy Gramling at Flamingo Road, is just hours away from broadcasting himself live 24/7 for ministry purposes.

On September 9th at 9 pm, Pastor Troy will be hooked up to a round the clock webcam for five weeks in four locations: house, car, hotel, and office.  Every day, all day, you can see his life in a fishbowl - the good, the bad, the great, the ugly.

Why?  Well, according to the website: "Let us tell you why not — it is not too exalt him. Rather, to realize with him, that we are all fish in a bowl. The more transparent (naked) we get, the more God can do amazing things through us. We weren’t created to be people in hiding, concealment, or shame, we were created to be real, naked and unashamed. So get ready, 'cause Flamingo Road Church is going in a bowl and we hope you’ll watch."

The controversy surrounding his story revolves around things like narcissism, sensationalism and publicity.  People are wondering if he's gone too far.  Would you put your laundry room online?  How about your morning scramble for the carpool line, the tension over homework and soccer games, how about the half hour before dinner is served when all (usually) normal family members morph into otherworldly beings?  

Last year I posted about My Life's Bits at Stanford University which launches the live webcam hookup into an entirely different league. Instead of simply putting daily life on tape, scientists are developing software to archive, in a hyperlinked, multi-media, kind of way, our whole lives.  This means every document you read gets archived.  Every show you watch, every song you listen to.  Each photo you take and each photo you see, all go into your personal digital archive.  Multi-media-ing your life might become normative when such software is released.  

The near future might provide opportunities for our lives to be hyperlinked in a way we can't yet understand.  Maybe Pastor Troy hasn't gone far enough…yet. 

John La Grou (who, yes, has mixed me up with his wife before due to too many incoming "Cynthia" emails) sent out this handy Wikiklesia authors' links list.  You don't even have to go to the wiki to get informed about the interesting and diverse authors who participated in the publication of Voices of the Virtual World. 

I certainly meant to blog some details about a few of them but I made the mistake of stopping by Bill Kinnon's achievable ends page.  There I ran into the Internet Way Back Machine!  (warning, warning, prepare to squander time…)

Thanks a lot Bill; now, instead of contemplating our future, I've researched my archived past.

 I'll put the list up now anyway and re-blog Wikiklesia later.

 
Andrew Jones
Andrew Perriman
Bill Kinnon
Bob Hyatt
Brad Sargent
Brother Maynard
Calvin Park
Cynthia La Grou
Cynthia Ware
David Hayward
Derek Flood
Drew Goodmanson
Ed Brenegar
Heidi Campbell
Jo Guldi
Joe Suh
John La Grou
John Sexton
Br. Karekin Yarian, BSG
Katharine Moody
Kester Brewin
Len Hjalmarson
Matt Reece
Michael Lissack
Mike Morrell
Mike Riddell
Peggy Brown
Rex Miller
Rick Meigs
Scot McKnight
Scott Andreas
Scott McClellan
Scott Ragan
Stephen Garner
Stephen Shields
Steve Scott
Steve Knight
Stuart Murray Williams
Thomas Hohstadt
Wild Grace

It's a well known fact amongst my friends that I make up words and phrases to suit myself.  Even I, however, could not come up with some of the linkages, typos, mash ups and mutilations that appear in the search terms of my sitemeter on a regular basis. (See last month's Search Term Awards.)  

So, now I've decided to make it official.  I've added a humor category.  Once a month, I will present to you the depth of spiritual substance that permeates the backend of this seemingly shallow blog.  Here, dear readers, are your search terms:

• typepad to make virtual people say stuff (wholly different than wordpress to make virtual people say stuff)
• curse of the digital spirituality
• listen to the bible written by jack hayford  
• holy bib  (not to be confused with holy diaper)
• dieting with christian blogs
• dangers of church mentoring onliners (not to be mistaken for mentoring with one liners)
• what is an epod of the bible  (Google fetches me because it sometimes cannot interpret between epod, ephod and iPod, not that it matters, because you could cover yourself with either.  Better yet, get an iPhone which can be all things to all men, camera, phone, mp3, tv, web, underwear, whatever) 

And last but not least:

• Cynthia's computer college (if only I could charge tuition)

Again, readers from all over the world, well for that matter cyberspace, include the the U. S. Government & the U.S. Department of State, Asbury Theological Seminary, Pepperdine University (ok, so these are the ladies at my church) North Carolina A&T State University and MIT.  From Apple to Intel, from wifi hotspot NetherlandsSchiphol, Noord-Holland to Serbia and Montenegro to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah Malaysia, they've all stopped by. 

I guess just about everyone is still interested in the Church and technology.

I won't tell you whose search terms are whose.  What's your traffic like?

Notice, unlike other bloggers, I have no humor category. Why should I?  My daily laughs come from simply reviewing the search terms used to arrive at this site.

Here are a few of the best ones recorded this month:

(No, I am not making these up….)

• learn the bible in 24 hours on mp3
• demolishing church sanctuarys (spelled this way)
• Apple + Satan
• keep the internet out of my church
• long tail catholic
• start your own instant bible institute (yes, the words appeared in this order)
  

I'm just saying these are my readers, my people.

Besides the US Military, including both the navy and the army, I've been visited by NASA, A. C. Nielson (Nielson was my dream career in college), MIT, Cornell & Harvard Universities.  From the Screen Actors Guild, Intel and Google to The Christian Broadcasting Network, from Nord-Pas-de-Calais Strazeele, France to The United Republic of Tanzania, they've all stopped by. 

I guess just about everyone is interested in the Church and technology.

I won't tell you whose search terms are whose.  What's your traffic like?